What May Be Achieved With Rupert's Legal Aid

Britain's Head Boy has issued a full and frank apology for allowing Andy Coulson to impose upon his good nature. Thanks to Daveybloke's excessive generosity, with which so many of Britain's poor and vulnerable are all too familiar, a criminal has been allowed into Downing Street for almost the very first time. Coulson, as we know, was originally oozed into the Head Boy's tea-room primarily to keep Daveybloke and his chums on the path of Murdoch virtue; this was before Murdoch's attempted ingestion of BSkyB, when Jeremy C Hunt's qualifications as a member of the News Corporation goon squad had the chance to obtrude themselves. So manifest were Coulson's abilities, as a Murdoch minion and former scumbag press editor, that he was never even properly vetted, and he duly became one of the few genuine crooks of ignoble birth whom Britain's Head Boy considered worthy of both the vote and a second chance. Clearly, Daveybloke in his exceeding innocence has been cruelly exploited; doubtless Leveson is to blame.

Nevertheless, it does appear that Coulson was a more competent scumbag press editor than Rebekah Brooks, who has been found innocent of just about everything that was going on at the tabloid she nominally ran. Her solicitor said that she could not comment because the trial was still going on. There's a first time for everything.