Parties of God

Immigrants are partly responsible for slowing the decline in church attendance, according to the latest UK Church Statistics. Doubtless this has nothing at all to do with the purely moral decision by the Church of England to forbid its clergy membership in the British National Party, on the grounds that church doctrine on race equality contravenes the teachings of the BNP, not to mention the teachings of the Palestinian fundamentalist who called the Canaanites dogs. The Church of England has not banned its clergy from membership of the English Defence League, because the EDL lacks a formal structure, and the Church of England does not believe in discriminating against racists who lack a formal structure. Presumably on similar grounds, the Church of England has also not banned its clergy from membership of the Farage Falange. Labour and the Liberal Democrats, being nowadays largely composed of soggy Tories and unctuous hypocrites, are of course the Anglican clergy's natural political homes; membership of the brutal, greedy, corrupt and vicious Conservative Party also remains permissible, doubtless on the purely spiritual grounds that, like the Farage Falange, the Conservative Party appeals disproportionately to the same sclerotic gay-baiting blue-rinsers who are helping the immigrants clutter up the pews.