The Curmudgeon


Wednesday, December 25, 2013

The Good Homosexual

Chris Graybeing, the Minister for Justice and Heterosexual Hostelry, has announced a posthumous royal pardon for Alan Turing, who was convicted of "gross indecency" on traditional Christian grounds in 1952. Turing was a mathematician who contributed to the victory of Winston Churchill and the Conservative Party in the Second World War and who, as an afterthought, was a significant pioneer in computer science. Graybeing, of course, gets along nearly as well with gay people as his brilliant colleague Iain Duncan Smith does with mathematics and IT; and the gritted-teeth wording of the announcement, "a sentence we would now consider unjust and discriminatory", sparkles with the coalition's customary generosity of spirit. Nevertheless, there is a bright side: fifty thousand lesser men, who were similarly persecuted during the twentieth century, will have to wait a little longer for the establishment to forgive them.


  • At 10:29 pm , Anonymous The Judge said...

    A thought occurs to me that one positive use for The Great Firewall of Millbank would be in preventing us from ever seeing photographs of Smith, Grayling or May online ever again, as they would clearly be classified as 'ladies' frontbottoms' and so blocked from viewing by those of a sensitive mien.

  • At 1:22 am , Blogger Philip said...

    The first two could also be classified as rampant pricks; which would unfortunately preclude their only conceivable useful function, namely as visual aids in the sort of fantasy primary-school sex education class which makes a certain type of Tory go all royal purple round the edges.


Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]

<< Home