The Curmudgeon

YOU'LL COME FOR THE CURSES. YOU'LL STAY FOR THE MUDGEONRY.

Friday, November 30, 2012

Go Back to Your Constituencies and Prepare for Government

Fury at Europe horror

Pro-Europeans and other members of the reality-based community were breathing sighs of relief today as Nigel Farage proclaimed UKIP the new third force in British politics.

The United Kingdom Independence Party is well known as a haven for people not intelligent enough for the party of Iain Duncan Smith, not nice enough for the party of Eric Pickles, or too sebaceous for the party of George Osborne.

Farage's remarks came after three by-elections this Thursday, when UKIP performed well against the Conservatives and Deputy Conservatives despite the near-universal esteem in which both coalition parties are held.

"It's a rare positive result for Britain in Europe," said one fairly normal person this morning.

"It's difficult to express our joy at Mr Farage's pronouncement. The feelings of a mad mullah on hearing Tony Blair declare peace in the Middle East, the feelings of a millionaire banker on hearing Vince Cable promising tough measures.

"Or even the feelings of a thuggish press baron on hearing David Cameron say he would implement Lord Leveson's recommendations - I suppose that would come close."

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