It's All About Fairness

Government attempts to give the proles a bit of moral backbone have reached such rarefied ethical heights that even some Conservatives are starting to feel queasy. Lord Mackay of Clashfern, who was lord chancellor under the sainted Thatcher and the subsequent interregnum, has registered disquiet at the idea of making people pay for the services of the Child Support Agency. Daveybloke's Cuddly Coalition plans to allow the CSA to charge up to twelve per cent of any maintenance collected, and to impose a fine of fifty or a hundred pounds on anyone who has the gall to try using the agency while claiming unemployment benefits. The idea seems to be that there is nothing like a cash-flow crisis to bring a couple together again; and, of course, those who are not legitimate couples are little better than single parents, breeders of riot and work-shyness and militant expectations of free university courses, who should be thankful for any chance at self-improvement.

Ministers may be prepared to lower the charges, which would retain the all-important principle that justice is for those who pay; and they have also tabled an amendment watering down the requirement that applicants demonstrate an attempt to reconcile with their absent ex-partner, perhaps by paying News International for a transcript of their telephone conversations. Nevertheless, Lord Mackay still seems to think there is something wrong with docking the child maintenance of people who can't afford to hire their own bailiffs. He has met with Iain Duncan Smith and has found the reply "hard to make out", though it is as yet unclear whether this is due to the foot in Duncan Smith's mouth or the rectum encasing his head.

Me at Poetry-24
Family Values