The Curmudgeon


Tuesday, December 06, 2011

Pottinger Speaks

Relationship was "completely innocent waste of time"

The woman at the centre of the latest Tory sex scandal has spoken out defending the Prime Minister against allegations of wrongdoing.

Fashion icon Belle Pottinger, who famously advised former PM Margaret Thatcher that even a foaming right-wing harridan could win a general election if she lowered her voice once in a while, is accused of having improper relations with Government members.

Busty Belle, who also charmed New Labour into calling off the Serious Fraud Office over corruption allegations in the Al-Yamamah arms deal in 2006, said today that she hadn't done anything and it was all in the national interest anyway.

She was telephoned by a close friend named Dyson on a Friday afternoon with "a huge issue", pouted Pottinger. "On the Saturday, David Cameron raised it with the Chinese prime minister."

With her next delectable breath, Belle stated that it was "simply untrue" that she or anyone else had any influence on government, and that paying her to get a politician to bring something up would be a waste of time. Belle has advised the Iraqi government on democracy.

Thirty-six per cent of MPs questioned said that socialising with Belle and her crowd was "an important part of the week", and nearly sixty per cent said that Belle's activities did not imply any cleavage between public interest and private business.

Downing Street denied any "undue access", and requested that journalists "show proper respect to the Prime Minister's family at this difficult time".


  • At 8:11 pm , Anonymous Madame X said...

    Then Dyson should hire me. I have no influence whatsoever.

  • At 10:26 pm , Blogger Philip said...

    Exactly. There are millions of people with no influence. If that's what they want, I wish they'd just buy our votes honestly like in the good old days.

  • At 1:08 am , Anonymous darjeeling junkie said...

    "On the Saturday, David Cameron raised it with the Chinese prime minister."
    Ooooer! Yes,sirrr!
    I think the the only other Potinger I've heard of was/is a reggae producer from the 60s.Sonia Potinger.I'm gonna look it up now to see if I've got that right.


Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]

<< Home