The Curmudgeon


Tuesday, October 05, 2010

Treasures Upon Earth

Objectively disordered and backsliding persons have registered annoyance that the Department of Energy and Climate Change paid more than a third of the costs of last month's visit by the sixteenth Daddy Goodspeak. The total cost of the visit was ten million pounds, of which the Foreign and Commonwealth Office, being merely the department responsible for foreign affairs, paid about one-thirteenth. The remainder was split between five more departments which the Treasury thought had something or other to do with the business. These included the departments of communities and local government (the Vatican's commitment to democracy among the little folk is legendary), international development (the Vatican's dedication to helping the AIDS epidemic in Africa is unrivalled), and education (enough said). Asked to explain why the Department of Energy and Climate Change should contribute towards a sectarian stunt by a noted champion of overpopulation, the Foreign Office claimed that the sixteenth Daddy Goodspeak would "reposition the issue of climate change not just as a matter of economics and energy security, but also one of social justice, stewardship of the natural world and of fundamental import to the peaceful coexistence of man". Obviously this would be rather jolly, particularly if the British Government had the slightest interest in social justice, the natural world or the peaceful coexistence of man. The Foreign Office also said that the Vatican had a "proactive stance" on the environment; there are solar panels on the roof of the Paul VI auditorium, for example, which the Vatican was proactive enough to accept as a gift from a German company. The Vatican has also, very proactively, permitted some trees to be planted in Hungary; and in four years' time the Vatican will open a solar power plant whose excess output it would evidently be unchristian to give away.


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