Birmingham Blues

This year let it never be said
That we're nasty or mean or ill-bred.
We must show we are kind
And upstanding behind
The party with whom we're in bed.

The BBC, as we all knew,
Will be nice and impartial and true:
Mark Thompson's reporters
Would sell us their daughters
If that's what we told them to do.

To this dump here's the reason we came:
We must show that dear George is quite tame,
And that Dave's a good egg
Who has trained our pet Clegg
To do tricks and respond to his name.

Our economy's lack of distension
Is causing most terrible tension.
The banks are not lending
And you are not spending,
And that's why we're pinching your pension.

Let little folk both near and far
Take heed and see just who we are:
No disloyal mutters -
We're Daveybloke's cutters
We're here for our conflab, rah rah!