Economy Cooking

From Daveybloke's Big Society Book of Recipes for Rah Rah

Ingredients
1 Bullingdon lapdog
1 orange sub-mandarin
1 handful of picked cherries
10 tons of best parliamentary Pickles
300 million pounds of tax-free Monégasque Greens

Preparation
Marinade lapdog in champagne and honey for 43 years, then hang thoroughly with orange sub-mandarin and place in cabinet at high temperature until all cherries are popped. Stew for 100 days, watching carefully for press releases. (These may be discarded, or if preferred may be utilised in attempts to make a shit sandwich resemble a healthy diet.) Saturate Pickles in skimmed cream for as long as can be got away with and add Greens for a fair odour. Allow to settle until you are completely cooked.

Serving Suggestion
Just bend over and take it. This dish serves itself.