The Curmudgeon

YOU'LL COME FOR THE CURSES. YOU'LL STAY FOR THE MUDGEONRY.

Wednesday, February 03, 2010

A Powerful Message

A senior and experienced hired gambler has been fined and banned from working in the City for costing his employers four hundred thousand pounds which could not be claimed back from the taxpayer.

Simon Treacher treacherously inflated the value of trading positions and altered documents to justify his misvaluationisings, and later astounded the Financial Services Authority by giving misleading answers in two interviews.

The director of the FSA said: "Our actions in banning Simon Treacher and imposing a significant fine will send a powerful message of deterrence to others who might be tempted to behave in this way".

Heavy penalties are thought to deter crime because of the typical criminal's tendency to plan on being caught.

City workers, in particular, are known for their unusually considerable gifts of intelligence, forethought and cool-headedness, especially those who lack the financial probity of the average hedge fund manager.

2 Comments:

  • At 10:48 pm , Blogger Paul said...

    Of course this is a very grave matter, one of integrity: the proper management of funds is a concern for all right-thinking people, yet still I am impressed that the FSA is willing to offer a 30% discount for early confession.

     
  • At 12:51 pm , Blogger Philip said...

    It just goes to show what a kinder, gentler nation we are, thanks to the ministrations of Tony and his chums.

     

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