Meanwhile, On An Unfamiliar Planet...

The peculiar David Davis has been attacking his Head Boy's austerity rhetoric, at least as far as it concerns Daveybloke's policy of trying to appear to care whether a few million more little chaps in Wonga Wonga Land get a bit more sun than they're used to. David Davis pontificates about the Stalinist horrors of the green movement. David Davis believes that the green movement is full of people with an instinct for "statist, regulatory, dirigiste regimes", unlike the Conservative Party, whose regulatory instincts are directed solely at non-contributors. David Davis believes that too many discussions on climate change have degenerated into name-calling. David Davis does not consider it acceptable for those who deny the existence of climate change to be called climate change deniers, because this has "deliberate holocaust connotations" which may offend the Conservatives' new chums in Europe, to say nothing of oil company executives and sustainable-uranium salespersons. David Davis also finds it unacceptable for people who believe their opponents are deliberately falsifying evidence to "essentially call their opponents liars". David Davis favours a middle way. David Davis believes that a miraculous microgeneration technology is just around the corner, but it seems unlikely that David Davis would favour any statist, regulatory, dirigiste regime such as a Government-funded housing drive that would incorporate this technology once it deigned to appear. David Davis believes that we should not destroy our beautiful landscape with nasty, noisy wind turbines. David Davis believes that we should preserve our beautiful landscape with "a major increase in nuclear power", which has proven so clean, so reliable and so profitable to the sort of people David Davis cares about. David Davis also believes we should maximise cloud reflectivity, a process for which the technology is "still some way off", patiently waiting for sufficient extinction to occur for there to be sufficient demand for the free market to light upon it. David Davis believes we should "give more prominence to a policy of adaptation", as befits one of Britain's two or three main parties of Social Darwinism. David Davis believes we should worry that "cutting the world's growth will condemn millions of people to continuing poverty in the decades to come" - after all, we have just had a global economic boom, and the world's poor are substantially better off for the resulting trickledown. David Davis believes that it is proper to worry about the potential effects of global warming, at least on "the poorer parts of the world", such as British Petroleum's deprived shareholders. David Davis also believes that "the planet appears to have been cooling, not warming, in the last decade". Perhaps David Davis believes in a middle way between global warming and global cooling. Perhaps David Davis believes in global staying the same. That would certainly provide no excuses for people with an instinct for statist, regulatory, dirigiste regimes. What a relief.