The Curmudgeon


Tuesday, November 03, 2009

Science is a Wonderful Thing, But...

A minister who initially disagreed with the Home Secretary's decision to sack his independent advisor for giving independent advice has clarified his position after receiving assurances from the Home Secretary himself; and, after all, everyone knows by now what those are worth. Lord Drayson, who apparently was a lord even before falling into step with the Government, accepted the Minister of Tough's assurances of "the importance he attaches to scientific advice and his respect for scientific advice", provided that scientific advice does not trumpet its independence in such a way as to drown out the Government's own standard dog-whistle.

The Glorious Successor meanwhile clambered into the fray with his customary adroitness and subtlety, reminiscent of Daveybloke's occasional forays into intended humour, or of a three-legged rhinocerous negotiating its way up Ann Widdecombe. "Scientific advice is very important and we value it," the Glorious Successor said. "You can see that with swine flu" and the complete lack of media panic it has caused; "with climate change" and the brilliant combination of doing nothing and doing worse than nothing which has been the Government's response; "and with all sorts of environmental problems", thanks to the dip in carbon emissions resulting from the recession which Gordon has so thoughtfully engineered and so considerately prolonged. Nevertheless, "we cannot send out a message to young people that it's OK to experiment with drugs and to move on to hard drugs"; which would inevitably be the lesson drawn should the Government do anything so foolish as reclassify certain substances whose evil harmfulness and harmful evilness have been set in tablets of stone since the beginning of time, or at any rate since the Daily Maul started taking a benevolent interest.


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