Deserving Cases

The Ministry of Fitness for Purpose has discovered that the UK is home to suspected war criminals, who are immune to prosecution because of a legal loophole that New Labour has somehow, despite its reforming, re-writing, paradigm-shifting, kaleidoscope-jangling zeal in other areas, failed to slam shut. Even now, with Tony Blair doubtless beavering away in the Middle East so as to secure the pacific legacy of George W Bush, there are 1,863 people in the country who have been investigated over possible involvement in crimes against humanity, war crimes and genocide. About three hundred a year are recommended for "immigration action"; a slightly lower rate than the hundred and eighty a day of which the delightful Phil Woolas boasted this October. But of course, he was talking of civilians, cancer victims, indiscreet gay people and the like; not about real people like Margaret Thatcher's friend Augusto, or even Margaret Thatcher's friend Gordon.