Virtual Orphans

An internet game in which the object is to turn one's character into the "hottest, coolest, most famous bimbo in the whole world" has set aflame the glands of righteous indignation among those parents who believe that the internet should be the new television, namely a relatively inexpensive means of keeping the spawn out of the way. A spokesbeing for a parents' rights group noted that the game "becomes a hazard and a menace" if a child "fails to appreciate the irony and sees the bimbo as a cool role model". Since this same spokesbeing also believes that "children's innocence should be protected as far as possible", it seems doubtful that this should be taken as an exhortation to teach nine-year-olds the appreciation of irony. Ironically, however, the danger to the children (the peril that, thanks to the game, "some will then aspire to have breast operations and take diet pills" - just think of all the estate agents we might have avoided if only it weren't for Monopoly) depends on "the background and mindset of the child" - factors over which parents, particularly those who spend all their time organising parents' rights groups, exercise no control whatever. Children are "easily influenced at that age as to what is cool", according to a father for whom the task of influencing his own children is apparently not easy enough. Worse yet, the spokesbeing said that the game also constituted "a financial danger for parents if they did not keep an eye on the texts that were sent". The clear statement of a problem can sometimes imply a solution; could it be that in this case...? Evidently not: "one parent threatened the creators with legal action after his daughter ran up a £100 mobile bill sending texts without his knowledge". Perhaps he was watching television at the time.