Role Models By Appointment

The Minister for Britishness Enforcement, Hazel Blears, has proclaimed that young black people, not having the likes of Hazel Blears to look up to, are choosing the wrong role models, and that it's time to cut through the bling and the rap stars. "Too often the role models for young black boys and young men are celebrities and rappers, who can glamorise crime, gangs and guns", a glamour to which young white boys and young men, not to mention our beloved rulers, are apparently immune. The white community is awfully well adjusted. Nevertheless, "research shows that in the absence of positive role models in the home, children seek their models from the street, the media or fantasy"; which must be why Blears has picked a policeman, a fashion designer and the winner of a television game show to appoint replacements. Along with the founder of Operation Black Vote, the three will "appoint 20 national role models who will be drawn from business and the professions"; government-approved role models being the logical next step after police-approved political demonstrations. Blears said that "the role models would visit youth clubs, offenders' institutions and schools, as well as appear on TV to show that young black people can succeed"; which will make all the difference, obviously.