Profitable Prisons

Following the recommendations of his chum, Lord Carter, the Minister of Prisons has announced a new package of measures to cope with the overcrowding in Britain's prisons; namely, the building of more prisons. After all, the Bush administration solved the problem of war in Iraq by escalating the war; and, as we all know, if it's good enough for George and the gang, it's good enough for New Labour.

The three planned new prisons will be much bigger than those we have at the moment, being designed to hold 2500 anti-social human resources each. In a brief access of quasi-Wagnerian fervour, New Labour's most durable empty suit has described them as "Titan" jails. The original Titans were Greek gods who castrated their father and were eventually defeated and imprisoned by the Olympian gods; but it seems unlikely that the grey suit's speechwriter had Greek myth in mind. He probably just meant that the jails will be awfully big.

The plan is opposed by the Howard League for Penal Reform, by Nacro, by the probation officers' union, and by the Prison Reform Trust. Fortunately, however, the new prisons are likely to be run by private companies, so they will serve the only purpose New Labour has ever recognised for public services, namely that of making a profit.