News 2020
Parents to get more money under new law
Hard-working parents who find themselves unable to spare sufficient funds to cope with the pensions crisis will be able to sue their children for help under new legislation in the war on irresponsibility, the Home Office announced today.
"Too many parents who have worked hard and made sacrifices to pay for their children's marketability find themselves without financial support almost as soon as the Government allows them to stop working," the Home Secretary said.
The Government would not shrink from taking the necessary measures to re-responsibilitise Britain's youth, he said. "Just because parents have paid to put young people through school doesn't mean education is free," he went on.
Under the new laws, parents will have the right to sue their children for living space and a monthly income not exceeding a certain percentage of the juvenile party's total earnings. There will be rebates for couples who were married in church and have two or more children born in wedlock.
Similarly, parents who supplied broken homes and equivocal moral values may be means-tested or given community service tasks so that they can earn whatever proportion of their children's income they are eventually awarded.
The leader of the opposition, Boris Johnson, condemned the proposed legislation as "legalistic welfare-statism" which within a few years would result in "wrinkly calamity staring us in the face".
"It is simply a disgrace that the Government, instead of offering labour skills training opportunities for superannuation freedomisation marketability enhancement, simply attempts to sweep the carpet under a judicial wig," Mr Johnson said, before announcing that the NuConLib Alliance would be voting with the Government to get the bill through.
The Shadow Minister for Sanitation, Ethelbert Feeley-Mossop, is understood to have sent a letter to the Prime Minister requesting him to ensure that there are no "loopholes" in the legislation which will permit "unwarranted financial thumb-sucking by Private Secretaries whose ministers enjoy a harmless whack of school uniform and talcum powder outside Parliamentary hours". The Prime Minister is not, as yet, known to have replied.
Hard-working parents who find themselves unable to spare sufficient funds to cope with the pensions crisis will be able to sue their children for help under new legislation in the war on irresponsibility, the Home Office announced today.
"Too many parents who have worked hard and made sacrifices to pay for their children's marketability find themselves without financial support almost as soon as the Government allows them to stop working," the Home Secretary said.
The Government would not shrink from taking the necessary measures to re-responsibilitise Britain's youth, he said. "Just because parents have paid to put young people through school doesn't mean education is free," he went on.
Under the new laws, parents will have the right to sue their children for living space and a monthly income not exceeding a certain percentage of the juvenile party's total earnings. There will be rebates for couples who were married in church and have two or more children born in wedlock.
Similarly, parents who supplied broken homes and equivocal moral values may be means-tested or given community service tasks so that they can earn whatever proportion of their children's income they are eventually awarded.
The leader of the opposition, Boris Johnson, condemned the proposed legislation as "legalistic welfare-statism" which within a few years would result in "wrinkly calamity staring us in the face".
"It is simply a disgrace that the Government, instead of offering labour skills training opportunities for superannuation freedomisation marketability enhancement, simply attempts to sweep the carpet under a judicial wig," Mr Johnson said, before announcing that the NuConLib Alliance would be voting with the Government to get the bill through.
The Shadow Minister for Sanitation, Ethelbert Feeley-Mossop, is understood to have sent a letter to the Prime Minister requesting him to ensure that there are no "loopholes" in the legislation which will permit "unwarranted financial thumb-sucking by Private Secretaries whose ministers enjoy a harmless whack of school uniform and talcum powder outside Parliamentary hours". The Prime Minister is not, as yet, known to have replied.
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