The Curmudgeon


Monday, April 10, 2006

News 2020

Millions stranded as dependents wait and hope

Millions of commuters across the country suffered unscheduled rapidity disfacilitation as striking transport operatives staged a one-day wildcat stoppage.

The strike action, which caused inconvenience to millions of commuters, was indulged in as a protest against proposed Government proposals which union organisers claim will mean financial losses to workers.

Commuters, millions of whom had families and children to feed, stood for hours on railway platforms waiting for the skeleton service which journey facilitation companies provided to cope with the emergency.

Transport Minister Hester Prigley-Maunder condemned the stoppage, calling it an attempt to "return to the dark winter days of fifty years ago when the unions left bodies unburied in the streets while miners' leaders were feted by Islamist dictators".

Squads of the Community Labour Arbitration Police were dispatched from their central base in Westminster to provide community protection to communities affected by the wildbeast action across the country.

Union leaders are demanding that the Government abandon its plans to introduce means testing for salaries three times the minimum wage or less.

A compromise possibility was raised last week that the measure could be voluntary at first and become compulsory only when new contracts were applied for or at the discretion of employers or relevant ministers, but the compromise was rejected by union leaders before members were balloted.

Ms Prigley-Maunder said today that "disruptifying the lifestyles of millions of working people,their children and grandchildren and helpless, elderly parents, is a very bad substitute for talking round the negotiating table."

The minister continued, "It may be easier to try to blackmail the Government and the public with the threat of bodies hurled down the mines through violent mobs of secondary pickets, but the Government will be ready to talk as soon as there is any indication of a greater degree of attitudinal constructivity."

The Government has stated that it cannot abandon the means test for salaries with low investment potential as it was a manifesto pledge and a vital strategic initiative in the approaching post-apocalyptic phase of the war on worker irresponsibility.


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