The Satanic Supplement
Amethyst,n. A shade of purple appearing in, and frequently descriptive of, the prose of bad romantic novelists.
Colonialism,n. Charitable policy adopted by advanced nations exclusively for the benefit of their poorer brethren. The stages are (1) conquest in the name of liberation; (2) economic rationalisation and restructuring of native buying habits; (3) guided democracy and insurgent pacification; (4) a firm hand; (5) temporary stabilisation measures; (6) a lesson they will never forget; (7) diminishing returns; (8) phased withdrawal; (9) peace with honour; (10) if only we had stayed.
Departed,adj. Insincerely dear and politely dead.
Family,n. The sale of one's future into paid or unpaid slavery in return for the delusion of immortality through one's offspring. A bargain even Faust had the sense to avoid.
Holocaust,n. The murder of approximately six million proto-Zionists in the death-camps of the exclusionary Aryan state, and now one of the primary justifications for the crimes of the exclusionary Zionist state. About eight million lesser persons also perished, including Slavs, Roma, Communists, Socialists, democrats, conservatives, homosexuals, the physically or mentally impaired, and those Christians whose humane scruples overcame their loyalty to the established churches. However, these deaths did not constitute a holocaust and, in order to avoid the danger of glamorising an evil dictatorship, are rarely mentioned today.
Literature,n.(Obsolete) The humble precursor of the modern-day book trade.
Necrophilia,n. A preference for sleeping partners who are also silent partners.
Penis,n. Male organ of susceptibility to Freudian analysis.
The concept of Father's castration
Would fill me with morbid elation
And strange nameless fears;
Till, with gardening shears,
I cut off the source of frustration.
Rev. Wibley Beamish
Scandal,n. A news agency's impersonation of moral outrage.
Xolp,n.(Onomatopoeia) An urgent request for aid, made while inadvertently swallowing large quantities of liquid.
The drowning man yelped, gulped, xolped and was gone.
Quargle Blimmer
Colonialism,n. Charitable policy adopted by advanced nations exclusively for the benefit of their poorer brethren. The stages are (1) conquest in the name of liberation; (2) economic rationalisation and restructuring of native buying habits; (3) guided democracy and insurgent pacification; (4) a firm hand; (5) temporary stabilisation measures; (6) a lesson they will never forget; (7) diminishing returns; (8) phased withdrawal; (9) peace with honour; (10) if only we had stayed.
Departed,adj. Insincerely dear and politely dead.
Family,n. The sale of one's future into paid or unpaid slavery in return for the delusion of immortality through one's offspring. A bargain even Faust had the sense to avoid.
Holocaust,n. The murder of approximately six million proto-Zionists in the death-camps of the exclusionary Aryan state, and now one of the primary justifications for the crimes of the exclusionary Zionist state. About eight million lesser persons also perished, including Slavs, Roma, Communists, Socialists, democrats, conservatives, homosexuals, the physically or mentally impaired, and those Christians whose humane scruples overcame their loyalty to the established churches. However, these deaths did not constitute a holocaust and, in order to avoid the danger of glamorising an evil dictatorship, are rarely mentioned today.
Literature,n.(Obsolete) The humble precursor of the modern-day book trade.
Necrophilia,n. A preference for sleeping partners who are also silent partners.
Penis,n. Male organ of susceptibility to Freudian analysis.
The concept of Father's castration
Would fill me with morbid elation
And strange nameless fears;
Till, with gardening shears,
I cut off the source of frustration.
Rev. Wibley Beamish
Scandal,n. A news agency's impersonation of moral outrage.
Xolp,n.(Onomatopoeia) An urgent request for aid, made while inadvertently swallowing large quantities of liquid.
The drowning man yelped, gulped, xolped and was gone.
Quargle Blimmer
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