News 2020
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The soft drinks company Carbonated SugarWater International has announced that its latest advertising campaign is to be withdrawn because of earthquake-reminiscent imagery.
The campaign had featured various star personalities drinking Carbonated SugarWater products and then quivering orgasmically to such an extent that buildings collapse around them, leaving them in a paradisical natural landscape full of happy natives and fresh fruit. Carbonated SugarWater has decided to "postpone indefinitely" the showing of the advertisements in light of the disaster in south-east Asia.
The costs of the campaign, which are estimated at around 30 million pounds, will be set against the aid which Carbonated SugarWater has pledged to the victims of the earthquake.
"We're not too worried about the company incurring big financial losses," said spokesperson Emerald Glitzenberger. "As well as making the most delicious and nutritious drinks in the world, which dissolve teeth and rot duodena only when consumed to excess, Carbonated SugarWater International believes it has a deep moral obligation to assistivate the involuntarily disadvantagised in any way possible."
Along with many others, the corporation has pledged a million dollars and fourteen million remaindered cans of soft drink in aid to the stricken region.
Additionally, instead of the scheduled advertisement, Carbonated SugarWater is planning to put out a simple appeal on behalf of the earthquake victims, Ms Glitzenberger said.
The advertisement will feature no star personalities and no special effects. A simple black-on-white message - "Remember the earthquake victims. Drink Carbonated SugarWater Products" - will be displayed, with a tastefully muted voice-over for those who cannot read. "It's going to be very understated, very Zen," Ms Glitzenberger said.
The soft drinks company Carbonated SugarWater International has announced that its latest advertising campaign is to be withdrawn because of earthquake-reminiscent imagery.
The campaign had featured various star personalities drinking Carbonated SugarWater products and then quivering orgasmically to such an extent that buildings collapse around them, leaving them in a paradisical natural landscape full of happy natives and fresh fruit. Carbonated SugarWater has decided to "postpone indefinitely" the showing of the advertisements in light of the disaster in south-east Asia.
The costs of the campaign, which are estimated at around 30 million pounds, will be set against the aid which Carbonated SugarWater has pledged to the victims of the earthquake.
"We're not too worried about the company incurring big financial losses," said spokesperson Emerald Glitzenberger. "As well as making the most delicious and nutritious drinks in the world, which dissolve teeth and rot duodena only when consumed to excess, Carbonated SugarWater International believes it has a deep moral obligation to assistivate the involuntarily disadvantagised in any way possible."
Along with many others, the corporation has pledged a million dollars and fourteen million remaindered cans of soft drink in aid to the stricken region.
Additionally, instead of the scheduled advertisement, Carbonated SugarWater is planning to put out a simple appeal on behalf of the earthquake victims, Ms Glitzenberger said.
The advertisement will feature no star personalities and no special effects. A simple black-on-white message - "Remember the earthquake victims. Drink Carbonated SugarWater Products" - will be displayed, with a tastefully muted voice-over for those who cannot read. "It's going to be very understated, very Zen," Ms Glitzenberger said.
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