Joined-Up Government

Although the climate breakdown will continue to result in large numbers of foreigns being broiled, drowned, starved, made homeless, or caught up in wars over vanishing resources, Britain's leading liberal newspaper has discovered that it has its downsides too. Britain's increasingly murderous heat in the summer and lack of sustained cold periods in the winter is disrupting the life cycle of indigenous apple trees, which may lead to an invasion by swarming hordes of lesser fruit. At the same time, the migrant workers who used to work in Britain's orchards have all been thrown out, so it's fortunate that for the moment there is nothing for them to pick.