News 2020

We regret that we cannot be held responsible if the future turns out differently due to inaccuracies in the present

The news media spend too much time reporting white-collar crime and not enough dealing with the concerns and interests of "the little people in the street", the Ministry for Public Enlightenment said today.

Ministry spokesperson Urticaria DuBois said that the focus on misdemeanours of the rich and powerful pandered to a deep-seated and not always conscious public prejudice against such people, thus contributing to an atmosphere of social envy and malaise.

"White-collar crime is also frequently concerned with international finance and all the complicated issues involved," Ms DuBois said. "Media presentations of such issues are necessarily short, which means they become over-simplified and contribute to the inadequacy of public comprehension."

The BBC, which has given about half a dozen corporate scandals passing mention in the last twelve months or so, offered an immediate and unreserved apology. The Head of News, Sam Boadenbrooks, is believed to have handed in his resignation.

If the resignation is accepted, Mr Boadenbrooks' successor will be the eighth Head of News this year. This represents an decrease in the number of high-level resignations over issues of bias compared with previous years, so it may be a hopeful sign for the BBC.

Newspaper editors have given a more nuanced reaction. The Times and Telegraph said they would continue the great British tradition of free speech by reporting the infiltration of corporate structures by asylum seekers and fraudulent welfare claimants. The Guardian said it would continue to report the truth and attempt to facilitate public comprehension insofar as this was not inconsistent with the maximisation of profits for Guardian Media Group plc.

Asked whether the Government planned to introduce legislation to monitor the reporting of white-collar crime, Ms DuBois said that the passing of laws regulating the media had been made difficult by the atmosphere of mistrust fostered by biased reporting, but that the Ministry of Public Enlightenment would, as always, do its best to push back the dark tides of ignorance.