It's Tough at the Top

With all that's going on in the world today, it can be difficult to keep in mind those unfortunates whose circumstances no longer rate major headlines, and yet who continue to suffer all manner of inconvenience. Therefore it is to be hoped that some thoughts and prayers can be spared for the victim of the Gaza crisis, who faces a seemingly endless succession of unpalatable choices. On the one hand, his far-right foreign sponsor has set up a hilariously named "board of peace" to oversee the territory's transformation from bantustan to beach resort; on the other hand, his far-right domestic allies are demanding a military junta to oversee its immediate and humourless colonisation by the master race. On the most superfluous hand of all, despite a ceasefire in which only one side has ceased firing, the Arab Untermenschen wilfully continue in their recalcitrant refusal to die out fast enough. Oh, the humanity.