Liquid Assets

New depths of British entrepreneurial gumption are being plumbed at Thames Water, which has announced half-yearly profits of four hundred million as a preliminary to squealing for more hand-outs. The company has been allowed to screw its customers for another thirty per cent on the bills, but not even the moderate sensibles of Team Starmer have so far capitulated to demands that fifteen years' worth of fines for environmental misconduct should be waived in advance. Even so, the national religion may yet require such a sacrifice in order to forestall the abhorrent expedient of temporary nationalisation, which the Government is anxious to avoid because of the slippery slope towards the antisemitic, extremist crypto-Putinism that would be permanent nationalisation.