Gone the Right Way

It appears that the long tribulations of the Maily Toryguff may soon be drawing to a heart-gladdening close, despite the saga featuring such paragons of fiscal Britishness as Nadhim Zahawi and the barking brothers Barclay of Sark. A consortium is buying the former newspaper for some four hundred and seventy-six thousand guineas, apparently under the impression that it has a chance of doing well in the realm of the Trumpster and his head-tribble. What form of evolution the Toryguff might be required to undergo before it can be sold to a country containing so substantial a population of militant nostalgics, self-pitying paranoiacs and functional illiterates remains as yet to be discovered.