Health and Safety

Much to everyone's surprise considering the presence of over a hundred Conservatives, seventy-odd Deputy Conservatives and approximately four hundred Wannabe Conservatives besides the Farage Falange, the Palace of Westminster is apparently riddled with toxic waste. Fires are breaking out every few months and asbestos is widely present, though evidently not in sufficient quantities to quiet the more forthright voices among the nation's elected, appointed, and entitled expenses claimants. Assuming the whole place doesn't burn down before they get a chance, travellers on the Westminster gravy train will eventually get a vote on whether to relocate temporarily and save the taxpayer money, or to spare themselves the inconvenience and keep costs rising for as many or as few of the next seventy years as the polite fiction of British democracy needs to be sustained.