The Curmudgeon


Thursday, September 29, 2011

That Environment Thingy Again

Britain's Head Boy has issued a stark warning that the juniors need to start taking better care of the playground. The environment, of course, is one of those matters on which Daveybloke likes to huff and puff now and then in the interests of keeping up his cuddliness quota, as when he tut-tuts over bankers' bonuses or implies that he's letting Twizzler Lansley demolish the NHS because that's what little Ivan would have wanted. Presumably, therefore, he wasn't thinking of plastic bags merely because the likes of Yvette Cooper and Caroline Flint were plastered across the news. The number of plastic bags used by shoppers has in fact gone down significantly in the last five years, since environmental campaigners publicised the damage they do; although their use rose again in 2010 with the advent of the greenest government ever. As one would expect, therefore, Daveybloke singled out major retailers and the Daily Mail for particular praise, but noted with the Brownite fluency characteristic of the properly educated that "progress overall went backwards last year". Daveybloke then warned that unless progress stops going backwards he may well become cross enough to ask somebody for an explanation.

Me at Poetry-24
Why We Fight


  • At 7:37 pm , Anonymous Madame X said...

    On a going-forward basis, that is.

  • At 8:14 pm , Blogger Philip said...

    Of course. It is only by retroactively proceeding in a forthright direction from the regressive forward march of the previous administration that we can pro-actively address the activation of our irreversible progress towards the reversion of their backward progression into retrogression.

  • At 3:31 pm , Anonymous Anonymous said...

    Brilliant! Once again, brilliant!


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