The Curmudgeon


Thursday, July 15, 2010

He Was A Parasite Too

Evil monster Raoul Moat asked for psychiatric help last summer, raising questions as to whether he should have been preventatively jailed or shot earlier and confirming the need for instant abolition of social services for the mentally unprofitable.

"I would like to have, erm, a psychiatrist, psychologist, have a word with me regularly, on a regular basis to see if there's somewhere underlying like where I have problem that I haven't seen," the vicious beast was recorded as saying.

"I would like a professional, you know, not a DIY thing you know? A professional thing for someone to come along and say look there's area for improvement here. This is a problem," the crazed brute gloated.

"If I'm at fault myself in any way I'm open to all kinds of suggestions but I refuse to spend the rest of my time fighting with social services," the callous killer claimed defiantly.

Newcastle city council, which dealt with the rabid fiend's case, said that it commissioned a report from a psychologist about whether it was safe for the mad dog to live with his two older children.

According to the council, the report recommended no treatment and concerned itself only with the safety and well-being of the children, expenditure of public funds on the well-being of violent, six-foot ex-bouncers being somewhat less defensible in the tabloids.

Prime Minister and professional sensitivity purveyor David Cameron yesterday condemned public sympathy for the callous murderer who sought psychiatric help from social services instead of going private as a real person would have done.

Sympathy should be directed towards Moat's victims, Cameron said, since sympathy, like everything else, is a limited commodity which decreases with expenditure and should not be wasted on those who cannot pay it back.


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