Moron of Khartoum

The deteriorating situation in Sudan seems to have left Britain's mighty private sector at a bit of a loss. Though the Conservatives were willing enough to throw public money at their chums during the pandemic, a curious lack of Dunkirk spirit has prevented their enlisting private aircraft, let alone small yachts, in the belated evacuation of non-expendables. No doubt there is blame on more than one side, as some potential evacuees are trying to sneak their elderly parents onto the mainland, thereby exacerbating beyond tolerance the Conservative Party's well-known concern over care home conditions and the National Health Service. Announcing that eight hundred and ninety-seven people had so far been evacuated, without noticeably furthering the nation's collapse beyond the state achieved by His Majesty's Government, the Minister for Wogs and Misnomer pointed out for the benefit of anyone who didn't know it that not even Global Britain can take all the refugees in the world, especially as nobody is asking it to. Speaking around his other foot, Cleverly also proclaimed that anyone aspiring to lead Sudan ought to start by demonstrating a willingness to protect the kind of people the master race aspires to deport to Rwanda.