Be a winner, be a Tory!
Act up bully, suck up whorey;
Make your life a stunt.
Lobby for the corporations,
Plump yourself in our great nation's
Gravy trains and social stations;
Keep a solid front.
Play the fool and cut up silly:
Pinch a bottom, slap a filly,
Fill your wallet, wave your willy -
Then you'll be a Conservative.
(Traditional)
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