Lessons For Labour

Just a bit of friendly advice, though they will certainly have worked out much of this for themselves.

First, Labour took Scotland's voters for granted for too long, and standing shoulder to shoulder with the Conservatives during the referendum campaign may have been the last straw. If there is another referendum, Labour should probably consider standing shoulder to shoulder with UKIP.

Secondly, English voters prefer a posturing, self-assured cripple-kicker to a vacillating, uncertain pretence of "decency". It's true that Duncan Smith's tawdry window-dressing Esther McVey lost her seat, but this may have been because she was too left-wing for hard-working families.

Thirdly, Labour must decide swiftly on a new leader. Much will depend on whether it elects a bland right-wing apparatchik like Chuka Umunna or an authoritarian Charles Clarke wannabe like Yvette Cooper. Umunna would be good for the hard-working black vote, but Cooper would be good for the hard-working female vote. Possibly having one as party leader and one as shadow chancellor would be a dream ticket for 2020.

Finally, the Deputy Conservatives are finished. They exercised little enough restraint on their masters in government, but as of today any hint of sanity regarding Europe is at the mercy of intellectual giants like Peter Bone. If it wishes to stay afloat in the choppy waters ahead, Labour must surf this wave of statesmanship to a new harbour of radical Britishness.

Onwards and upwards!