Vote For Us In Case We Vote Against Ourselves

Labour's wog-bombing spokesman, the Dickensian-monickered Vernon Coaker, has accused the Conservatives of playing politics because some of them still refuse to admit to the two parties' basic lack of difference. Michael Fallon - the same decent honest chap who put his name to a Crosbyite smear about Labour's leader having fought an election against his brother and therefore being presumably willing to sell the country out to Vladimir Putin - was unable to say whether the Conservatives would join Labour to vanquish the fiend Sturgeon and protect Britain's weapons of mass destruction. Asked why the Conservatives couldn't support a minority government on the issue, Fallon blathered that the country needed to follow his own shining example and avoid the question. "We can't have this confusion or uncertainty," he said, having made everything as clear as Grant Shapps' second-best set of excuses. As of this writing, it remains unclear whether the Real Conservatives would vote with the Wannabe Conservatives on the numerous other policy areas where they remain more or less indistinguishable.