Simple Solutions For Simple Minds

I am in receipt of my first bit of election bumph, or my second if one counts the Chancellor's recent gobbet of scrounger-baiting. The Farage Falange has evidently taken to heart my constructive criticism of the incoherent squeal which was its bumph at the local elections last year, and has presented me with a long list of things - limited resources, green spaces, the NHS, congestion, overdevelopment, libraries, rising crime, lack of parking, etc. - in the hope that I am concerned about at least some of them. Under the Farage Falange there will be more sovereignty, less regulation, more services, less income tax, more green spaces, less green crap, more NHS (the Caudillo is apparently in favour this week) and lots more parking. The Farage Falange, as usual, will achieve all this and solve everything else by leaving the EU, thereby opening Britain up to global trade where we will obviously do much better with the EU as one of our competitors. (We will not be a trading partner of the EU, because that would mean signing up to a lot of regulations from which the Farage Falange is sworn to liberate us.) Even "our tolerant society" has been endangered by the beastly wogs, which is certainly too bad of them; and the Farage Falange, bless it, has plans to fix that too.